Be Angry
Personally, I often shy away from anger. I have been taught to suppress and in doing so I have an unhealthy relationship with anger. I hold a lot in and then it EXPLODES! My explosions are not good, they often leave me feeling drained. Now, recognize I am not saying the emotion of anger is wrong or bad. I am simply saying when I do not address it, it simmers, it steeps inside of me and then I pop off, on a moments notice, and often the thing that sets me off is not even the issue. So what I have learned is to be angry!
Being present in the moment when the anger hits and recognizing it, becoming intimate with it has helped me express my self in a much healthier way. I advocate for myself much better when I do this. You see the anger is a natural emotion set to help protect myself and or others. As a Mom the anger has helped me support my children and advocate for them when they could not. As a citizen it has helped me address injustice and speak to it. As a woman who is Black I have been able to garner courage to speak and to withhold my energy so it best supports me and not the foolishness I see often.
I am writing this blog post to share my experiences with anger in hopes that someone will hear that they too can release the notion that anger is bad. The bible says "be angry and sin not". It doesn't say anger is the sin. There are some serious issues that test us. There are those in powerful spaces that exert control and power unjustly and that is something to get angry about. I have some practices to share that can help you navigate through anger.
1) When anger hits, BREATH! Take deep breaths and really sense into what you are feeling (pain, hurt, fear,etc.)
Breathing sounds so simple, but notice when you are angry you often hold your breath or have shallow breathing. Its's OK, your body is in preparation to protect you. Taking deep breaths slows down the heartrate and and connects you to your senses and not to those others that provoked the anger. It can remind you that YOU are in control.
2) Pause before you speak BUT be aware that it is OK to speak without bringing harm to yoruself or others.
You have the power to disarm indivduals who attack and incite anger. Recognize that the trigger that sparked your anger came from somewhere. Take time to hear that and see if you are in a healthy and safe space meantally, physically and emotionally.
3) What do you want out of the situuation and is it in your power to get that?
Energy is precious, decide how you want to use it. Even though others may be trying to steal your power and dim your shine they do not have autonomy of your person. Get support FOR YOU! That is key and let anger help drive you to that.
Take care of you and remember releasing anger is key! If you need support in this let me help. I am here to do just that.
